Why do I love someone who doesn't love me back?

Updated: Jun 29, 2020

A client asks: why do I love someone who doesn't love me back? I know he doesn't love me back, but I keep on loving him anyway. Signed, Just Another Case of Unrequited Love

Photo by Laura Chouette on Unsplash

Dear Just Another Case of Unrequited Love -

In advanced yogic practices, a phrase is cast about: “I am that. I am not that.” Ultimate paradox, right? The one word summary to describe "I am that. I am not that" is...


Yes, you may feel like you're just another case of unrequited love. And, I'll say this with gusto. Your unrequited love is a very unique case too. "It is this. It is not this."


I believe the journey of unrequited love is a powerful experience that gives us the visceral, the tangible, the unmistakable experience of nonduality here on earth.

Your unrequited love is real even though society may tell you its not real love because its not reciprocated love.

Can I ask you to consider this?

My Unrequited Love is my Mirror.

Whatever I see in me, I see in my Unrequited Love. Whatever I see in him who doesn't return my love, this also exists within me.

Mirrors. Two mirrors facing each other, we create infinite mirrors within mirrors, within each other.

He is a mirror image. You are his mirror mirror image, and so on. You both are reflecting in each other, facing each other, reflecting to each other what exists in each other. Unrequited Love.

Look at yourself, Just Another Case of Unrequited Love.

You are the beautiful one. You are so very beautiful, Unrequited Love. I hope you see your reflection in your own mirror today.

You're alright,


Neelu Chawla, Marriage & Family Therapist, West Lafayette, IN, 47906 | Psychology Today

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